Our Curriculum › Social Skills › Grades 4–5
Social Skills 4-5
A social and emotional course meant to be used across 4th and 5th grade, at the pace that suits the child. It builds self-awareness, goal-setting and stress management, perspective-taking, listening, disagreeing respectfully, honesty, teamwork and sound decision-making.
180 lessons
One a day for a school year
7 units
Each opens to its lessons
STOP-THINK-CHOOSE steps
A method for hard decisions
Standards
CASEL social-emotional learning competencies
What's taught, unit by unit
Knowing yourselfDays 1–30
Strengths and growth areas, the power of yet, and eight feelings beyond the basics (embarrassed, nervous, jealous, guilty, overwhelmed). Helpful versus unhelpful self-talk, reframing, and personal values. The last six days are review.
- 1 · What Makes You... You?
- 2 · Naming Your Strengths
- 3 · Everyone Has a Growth Area (Even Grown-Ups)
- 4 · Growth Mindset: The Power of “Yet”
- 5 · Strengths in Action
- 6 · Strengths and Growth Areas Can Both Be True
- 7 · Embarrassed: The Feeling That Fades
- 8 · Proud: Celebrating Your Own Wins
- 9 · Nervous: The Feeling Before Something New
- 10 · Disappointed: When Things Don't Go as Planned
- 11 · Jealous: Wanting What Someone Else Has
- 12 · Guilty: When You Know You Made a Mistake
- 13 · Confident: Trusting Yourself
- 14 · Overwhelmed: When Everything Feels Like Too Much
- 15 · What Is Self-Talk?
- 16 · Helpful Self-Talk vs. Unhelpful Self-Talk
- 17 · Catching Your Unhelpful Self-Talk
- 18 · Reframing: Turning “I Can't” Into “I Can't Yet”
- 19 · Self-Talk During Mistakes
- 20 · Practicing Positive Self-Talk Out Loud
- 21 · What Are Values?
- 22 · Values Show Up in Your Choices
- 23 · Your Values Might Be Different From Someone Else's
- 24 · Living Your Values Every Day
- 29 · Putting It All Together: Your Self-Awareness Toolkit
- 30 · Final Reflection: Who You Are and Who You're Becoming
Plus 4 review days, not listed.
Managing yourself: goals & stressDays 31–60
Setting a specific goal, breaking it into steps, tracking it and sticking with it. Handling frustration, losing, and plans that go wrong with pausing, moving, slow breathing and talking. Last six days are review.
- 31 · What Is Self-Management?
- 32 · Setting a Real Goal
- 33 · Breaking Your Goal into Steps
- 34 · Tracking Your Progress
- 35 · When a Goal Feels Too Big
- 36 · What It Means to Stick With It
- 37 · “Not Yet” Instead of “Can’t”
- 38 · When Schoolwork Gets Frustrating
- 39 · Mistakes Are Part of Learning
- 40 · Practice Makes Progress
- 41 · Losing a Game
- 42 · When Things Don't Go as Planned
- 43 · The Power of the Pause
- 44 · Moving Your Body to Reset
- 45 · Slow Breathing, Calmer Mind
- 46 · Talking It Out
- 47 · Chunking a Big Task
- 48 · Reading Your Own Warning Signs
- 49 · Building Your Calm-Down Toolkit
- 50 · Sticking With a Goal Over Time
- 51 · Handling Disappointment
- 52 · Celebrating Progress, Not Just Finish Lines
- 53 · Balancing Work and Free Time
- 54 · Bouncing Back Instead of Giving Up
- 58 · Putting It All Together: A Tricky Day
- 59 · Your Top Strategy
- 60 · Your Self-Management Challenge
Plus 3 review days, not listed.
Seeing through others' eyesDays 61–90
Perspective-taking with siblings and classmates, reading clues, asking instead of assuming, quiet exclusion and why fair is not always equal. Family and cultural differences, empathy, and disagreements. Last six days are review.
- 61 · Same Event, Different View
- 62 · Your Sibling's Side of the Story
- 63 · What Your Classmate Might Be Thinking
- 64 · Reading the Clues Behind Someone's Reaction
- 65 · Ask, Don't Assume
- 66 · Spotting Quiet Exclusion
- 67 · Fair Doesn't Always Mean Equal
- 68 · Why Exclusion Hurts More Than It Looks
- 69 · What You Can Do When You See It
- 70 · When It's Bigger Than a Moment
- 71 · Every Family Runs Differently
- 72 · Holidays Don't Look the Same in Every House
- 73 · Different Food, Different Traditions
- 74 · Families Come in Different Shapes
- 75 · Curious Instead of Judgmental
- 76 · Empathy Is More Than “That Stinks”
- 77 · The Hard Day You Can't See
- 78 · Two People, Two Truths
- 79 · Understanding Someone You Disagree With
- 80 · Noticing the Quiet Signals
- 81 · When Your First Reaction Isn't the Whole Story
- 82 · A Harder Walk in Someone Else's Shoes
- 83 · Fairness on a Team
- 84 · Respecting Norms That Aren't Yours
- 88 · Putting It Together: A Tricky Situation
- 89 · Social Awareness Skills Check
- 90 · Looking Back on Understanding Others
Plus 3 review days, not listed.
Listening, disagreeing, including & compromiseDays 91–120
Active listening with follow-up questions, disagreeing respectfully (I see it differently), including others at recess and in group work, and finding middle ground. Closes with two stories and a wrap-up.
- 91 · Active Listening: More Than Just Looking
- 92 · The Follow-Up Question Trick
- 93 · Turning “That's Cool” Into a Real Question
- 94 · Listening Even When You Don't Agree
- 95 · Active Listening in a Group
- 96 · When Your Mind Wanders: Refocusing
- 97 · Listening to Understand, Not to Win
- 98 · Active Listening: Practice & Review
- 99 · What Disagreeing Respectfully Means
- 100 · “I See It Differently” — A Better Way to Disagree
- 101 · Disagree with the Idea, Not the Person
- 102 · Can You Disagree and Still Be Friends?
- 103 · When a Disagreement Gets Too Hot
- 104 · Disagreeing with an Adult, Respectfully
- 105 · Sticking to Your Opinion Without Being Pushy
- 106 · Disagreeing Respectfully: Practice & Review
- 107 · Noticing When Someone's Left Out
- 108 · The Invitation That Changes a Day
- 109 · Including Others at Recess
- 110 · Including Others in Group Projects
- 111 · When Including Someone Feels Hard
- 112 · Including Others: Practice & Review
- 113 · What Is Compromise?
- 114 · Finding the Middle Ground
- 115 · Check-In: Listening & Disagreeing
- 116 · Check-In: Including Others & Compromise
- 117 · Story Time: The Group Project
- 118 · Story Time: The Recess Problem
- 119 · Your Relationship Skills Toolkit
- 120 · Relationship Skills Part 1: Wrap-Up
Teamwork, honesty & trustDays 121–150
Compromise versus giving in, roles in group projects and fair share, disagreeing about how. Telling the truth when in trouble, owning mistakes, honest-but-kind answers, secrets, trust and keeping your word. Last six days are review.
- 121 · When You Want Different Things: What Is a Compromise?
- 122 · Compromising on a Team Project
- 123 · Fair Compromise vs. Giving In Every Time
- 124 · When Compromise Isn’t the Right Answer
- 125 · Taking On a Role in a Group Project
- 126 · Doing Your Fair Share
- 127 · Disagreeing About How to Do the Job
- 128 · When a Teammate Isn’t Pulling Their Weight
- 129 · Leading Without Bossing, Following Without Disappearing
- 130 · Teamwork Practice: Put It Together
- 131 · Telling the Truth When You Might Get in Trouble
- 132 · Owning Your Mistakes
- 133 · Honesty That Might Disappoint Someone
- 134 · Kind and Honest: Handling Tricky Questions
- 135 · What to Say When a Friend Asks for Your Honest Opinion
- 136 · Taking Credit Only for Your Own Work
- 137 · After the Truth Comes Out: Rebuilding Trust
- 138 · Secrets That Aren’t Okay to Keep
- 139 · Honesty Takes Courage
- 140 · Honesty Practice: Put It Together
- 141 · What Does It Mean to Be Trustworthy?
- 142 · Keeping Your Word
- 143 · Reliable in the Small Things
- 144 · Trust: Slow to Build, Quick to Break
- 148 · Putting It All Together: Being a Good Teammate and Friend
- 149 · Check In: How Have You Grown?
- 150 · Relationship Skills Capstone: Your Toolkit
Plus 3 review days, not listed.
Making responsible decisionsDays 151–170
Small and big decisions, stopping before reacting, looking for more than one option, thinking about who else is affected, the STOP-THINK-CHOOSE process, and scenarios on friends, rules, group chats, money and safety.
- 151 · What Counts as a Decision?
- 152 · Stop Before You Leap
- 153 · Thinking of More Than One Option
- 154 · “It Seemed Like a Good Idea, But...”
- 155 · Short-Term Feels Good, Long-Term Matters Too
- 156 · Who Else Does This Affect?
- 157 · Decisions and Fairness
- 158 · Honesty When It's Hard: Owning a Mistake
- 159 · Honesty When It's Hard: Giving Credit Where It's Due
- 160 · The STOP-THINK-CHOOSE Process
- 161 · Practicing the Process: A Group Project Decision
- 162 · Practicing the Process: Wants, Needs, and Money
- 163 · Deciding When Friends Want Something Different
- 164 · When a Rule and a Feeling Disagree
- 165 · Think Before You Send
- 166 · When You Wish You'd Chosen Differently
- 167 · It's Okay to Ask for Help Deciding
- 168 · Weighing Safety Risks
- 169 · Decisions That Affect the Whole Group
- 170 · Putting It All Together: A Full Decision
Year in reviewDays 171–180
Five look-back days, one per area of the course, then three combined scenarios, building a personal toolkit and a celebration. No new skills are taught.
- 171 · Looking Back: Knowing Your Feelings
- 172 · Looking Back: Managing Yourself
- 173 · Looking Back: Seeing Through Others' Eyes
- 174 · Looking Back: Building Real Relationships
- 175 · Looking Back: Making Responsible Choices
- 176 · Feelings Plus Perspective: A Combined Scenario
- 177 · Teamwork, Honesty, and a Tough Call
- 178 · Building Your Own SEL Toolkit
- 179 · The Full-Circle Scenario
- 180 · Celebrating a Year of Growth
By the end of the year, your child can
- Name a wider range of feelings and turn unhelpful self-talk into helpful self-talk
- Set a specific goal, break it into steps and keep track of progress
- Calm down when stressed using pausing, slow breathing or talking it out
- Listen actively and disagree respectfully without attacking the person
- Tell the truth, own a mistake and rebuild trust
- Work through a hard decision using stop, think, choose